why

Someone asked me why I am going to south America.
I wondered why it was hard to give an answer.
After thinking on it, I have the answer to why it's hard to answer, though perhaps not the reason I am going

It may be an act of faith.  
That there is something out there.  Something I don't know. Perhaps about myself.  Waiting to be learned.

I can't be sure. Or can't imagine what it might be. I've often quoted the Zen line
The way in, is the way out.  

Perhaps for me, this time, the way out is the way in.