Little boxes

So I have several boxes on my kitchen counter

The one on the right is stuff I am taking to Ecuador. Next to it is stuff I am taking but needs to be repacked. Far left, is a box of stuff I am pretty sure I am taking but want to think about it some more.

Elsewhere around the counter is various crap that I am not taking and need to put away. (those ice cubes are going to melt and then I will want some ice.)

I've been thinking about this for more than six months. First, I thought I would go down and stay. Now I am certain I will return. I am falling in love with Canby again. And, immodestly, I think I may still have some value in some of the upcoming projects. If I like Ecuador, it may become my getaway of choice. But I no longer feel the need to run away and never come back. I just want to run away for a while.

the way out is the way in -- to Ecuador

Three weeks until I fly to Ecuador and last night I finally took care  
of one of those little essential things -- got a return ticket.
Ecuador won't let you in unless you can show you can leave.

I was talking to my son about his New York internship and advising him  
to write down his goals before he left. At least with me, I will set  
goals in my mind, acheive them and not even remember they were goals.

So one of my goals was to feel more comfortable as a traveler. I never  
wrote it down, but I need to do that.

Last night as I was looking at the three legs of my trip home, I felt  
much more at ease evaluating the merits of different departure times,  
airports and legs.
I almost forget a few months ago how much less confidence I had in  
doing that.

I knew I wanted to fly out mid-morning -- so I didn't have to wake up  
and get ground transportation in the twilight.

Did I want to transfer in LAX and have a 16 hour duration trip or Las  
Vegas and SFO and have a 22 - 26 hour trip. Normally one would lean  
towards the shorter flight, but LAX has a reputation as a travelers  
hell. When our family returned from Mexico through LAX, one of my then- 
yougnsters labeled LAX, "the bad place."

So a call to a friend who travels a lot. She said LAX wasn't great but  
getting better. And she said, with my new TSA pre-clearance Global  
Travelers card, I should sail through customs.

24 days

It's usually like this.

In the past, major trips seem so far away. Then they are here. 

People are asking me, "are you excited?"

News flash -- I'm a funny guy. 

Not funny in making you laugh -- but as one friend puts it - quirky.

There may be some original injuries at work here of not wanting to get too excited. Part of my dear mother's effort to prepare me for a changing world. 

But maybe that is the point of the trip. Of reclaiming my life. I've only traveled a few times by myself in the past 25 years. Clearly, this will be the most ambitious. And that's why I am doing it. 

I am reminded of the time our main sewer line to the street went out in our first house in Salem. Homeowner for the first time, I quickly concluded -- while it was a new dilemma for me -- there was no alternative to the option of fixing it -- and soon.

I found someone who could come out the next day. He said he could work on it immediately. The estimate was $3,000. 

I tried to find others who would come out and look at the job. But no one else could be there for a week.

Based upon the best intelligence I had at the time, I said yes.

The next day the job was done. 

The bill came. It was $1,500.

I felt elated as I wrote a check for that amount.

I don't know what to call that part of human nature -- maybe it's comparison.

But I want to travel. By myself. And be comfortable doing it. So I'm planning a trip with exaggerated elements -- flying alone to a country I've never seen.

I am counting on the fact that after this trip -- other solo trips will cost half the emotional effort of this and feel the same sense of elation at planning a trip in August to -- say, New York City.

Or as Hoffman said in Way the Dog, "You think this is bad. This is nothing. You should have seen....."

Time to start taking it a little seriously

So I've started a list. OK. Who am I trying to impress. I've started several lists -- in several locations and on several media. Part of the charm of me living with me. It may seem like a fun time, but it gets challenging with immutable deadlines.

Still need to call my credit card companies and tell them I am hitting the road so they don't deny a charge while I am out of the country.

US State Department: fill in a voluntary report to the Quito Embassy so if there is a volcanic eruption, they will have the name of this American. 

Bill pay. I have 90% of my budget on auto. Just a few more things and it should coast.

Oh yeah, one more thing. I need to book a return flight. They won't let me enter Ecuador without proof that I am planning to leave at some point.

Holy shit

What once seemed like a distant possibility is now 30 days away. This time next month, I will be doing something I've never done -- and never thought I would do. Get on a plane and fly alone to South America.

I am nervous, scared and excited. It is a little like anticipating a jump in a very cold pool of water -- you know it will be a great experience, but not sure how much it will hurt.

I am feeling more confidence every day as I research where I am going and time I spend practicing Spanish. 

Still, holy shit. 

Something different happened last night.
I was talking about the affection I feel for the teachers I work with.
Every day, 6-8 of us gather at a table in our shared work room.
I was sharing a story about Tom. How much I enjoy his easy going nature.
We sometimes kid that it is even childlike.
He owns a pet turtle. He named her Dusty.
She hybernates in the winter and recently Tom has been excited in our lunch talks  ...Dusty is awake!
The other day, Tom was excited to bring in a video of Dusty walking.
He pulled it up on his phone.
Here was a turtle.  Still. Still.
Then one leg moves.
Tom shouts, See!

Something about his childlike wonder gave me the gigles.
And then it happened.
I opened my mouth and laughed out loud.
And laughed until I cried with tears of laughter.

May 9, 2015  -- my first belly laugh in a year.

Saturday 27 june 2015  09:15 Quito (UIO) 10:10 Cuenca (CUE) XL1541 Economy-V Maximum 2 pieces which weigh 23 kg in total

Here it is. Another step for me. My first booking of an international intra-country flight. Not a big deal I guess. But it is significant to me. First time I've done this. Won't be the last.

I've figured out the broad strokes on the canvas for three weeks. Next, a week in Peru with a trip to Machu Picchu.

So I was trying to figure out how to get back to Portland from Lima. But the flights sucked. First leg left at midnight and final leg included a five hour layover in San Francisco.

I couldn't figure out how to make it work. So instead of getting pissed off, I just walked away from the computer and did something else.

When I worked for Higher Education Chancellor Tom Bartlett, I would often hear Tom say, "If you can't answer the question -- change the question."

So if I can't find the flight home I want, then let's come up with another question.

Or as my coming of age favorite writer, Hunter Thompson used to say, "when the going gets weird, the weird turn pro."