Unseasonably calm

And maybe it's the time of year, yes, and maybe it's the time of man.
And I don't know who I am but life is for learning.
We are stardust, we are golden, we are billion year old carbon,
And we got to get ourselves back to the garden.

- Joni Mitchell

This is an odd feeling. Calm. I can usually find something to be anxious about. Especially when I am less than three weeks away from a big solo trip.

Even if I was completely ready -- which I'm not -- I would usually be anxious over the unknown.

But I am ready enough. I'm mentally ready. 

There was something about hitting the one-year mark living in my new place. Haven't developed the vocabulary for why, but it will come. Part of it may be a renewed sense of confidence in my own aloneness. It's not dreadful and I'm enjoying it more every day. And I now eagerly look forward to standing on a street alone -- four thousand miles from here and looking around and saying only to myself, "let's go check this out."